FBI 202 for Crime Fiction Writers: Interview with Scott Nelson, Part 2

by A.M. Khalifa, thriller writer, Google+

"The FBI has screwed up on occasion and folks seem to remember the bad things that happen more than the good things that occur daily."

On Tuesday, I ran the first part of my interview with Scott Nelson, the film industry’s leading technical expert on all matters FBI.  Mr. Nelson rose to head the FBI's public affairs office where he was instrumental in the creation of America’s Most Wanted, as well as convincing the filmmakers of the Silence of the Lambs to shoot on location at the FBI’s academy in Quantico, Virginia.

In this final segment of the interview, we expand the discussion beyond practical advice for crime fiction writers. He reflects on the times his life was in danger, his reputation as one of America's best door-shooters, and his work as one of the most sought after FBI technical experts in the film industry. Click here for part 1 of the interview.

A.M. Khalifa: Among your numerous accolades, you are also apparently one of America’s most accomplished door-shooters. What’s that all about?

SN: Well, I've been involved in more than one fugitive hunt and I've also provided advice to Hollywood about difficult door entries. Sometimes, the only way to get in is to breach the locking mechanism with bullets. But, this is definitely the last resort and often only under emergency conditions. In J. Edgar the movie, actors used Thompson Machine guns to blast their way into hoodlum hideouts, and frankly, the biggest problem we had there was clearing the set so no one was hit with hot .45 caliber Thompson Machine gun shells as they rapidly spit out the side of that deadly weapon. The Hollywood prop folks did the rest. And, they did it very well. Those scenes looked real to me even though I knew they were not.

AMK: Talking about guns, was your life ever at risk in the line of duty? 

SN: As a young Marine Captain in Vietnam I was lucky to survive. The biggest and toughest battle we fought was to re-take the historic city of Hue from the North Vietnamese Army who slaughtered thousands of residents and occupied the so-called Citadel there. I was wounded by fragments from an RPG rocket.

As a fairly new FBI Agent in Newark, N.J. - commonly referred to as the broken glass capital of the world - I was involved in a huge bank robbery shootout and hit in the face with lead from a bank robbers 9 mm. Fortunately, no FBI Agents were killed, although the bank robbers weren't so fortunate. One died; one was wounded 52 times; and one escaped injury by clinging to the underside of their getaway car. According to the Judge who tried the case in Federal court, the first shot which was fired by the bank robbers was like the splitting of an atom. All hell broke loose.

AMK: I'm glad you made it through. On a lighter note, you've worked with some top filmmakers. What can you tell us about those experiences?

SN: Filmmakers want to tell an appealing story, often with political and/or social overtones. And they want to do it well and be successful. They want the characters to be human, often with deep flaws that the public can recognize and identify with. They also want to be true to the facts - sometimes. The best filmmakers are able to meld fiction with fact and still deliver an appealing story. Plus, these top filmmakers are typically great story tellers with a sense of drama and context.

AMK: What if a filmmaker refuses to heed your technical advice, how do you resolve that? In other words, what happens when technical accuracy clashes with artistic vision?

SN: That is an interesting question, and a common occurrence. Unless it is a documentary, artistic vision usually wins out. And really that is to be expected in fictional pieces. Fact is, technical accuracy can be boring and difficult to sell.

AMK: Last time you said the notion the FBI is always prone to "screw over local law enforcement " is largely inaccurate. But I do know you have an even bigger pet peeve about how the FBI is depicted in popular culture.

SN: I think an even bigger misconception about the FBI is "that they spy on American Citizens." Not so. The FBI operates strictly within the Constitution, the Bill of Rights and the Rule of Law. True, they run complicated confidential undercover cases, do court authorized wire taps and often conduct surreptitious, sensitive investigations but they do so within the law and to protect the rights of all Americans. They always balance the intrusiveness of their investigations.

AMK: However, with recent revelations about the activities of the NSA, many people in America are arguably concerned whether all security agencies are indeed adhering to the law. Do you think members of the public have a hard time differentiating between one law enforcement agency and the other, and lump them all together as “the government”?

SN: I think many Americans recognize the FBI, but certainly they are fuzzy on the Bureau's investigative jurisdiction - over 350 different criminal violations - and the legal and administrative basis for their investigations. Plus, the FBI has screwed up on occasion and folks seem to remember the bad things that happen more than the good things that occur daily. I do think many folks confuse the various agencies and typically lump them all together. As I recall, there are approximately 19,000 local, state, and federal law enforcement agencies out there. And that doesn't include the intelligence agencies like NSA and CIA etc.

AMK: We spoke about the risk of copy-cat criminals getting inspired by fiction. Recently and after the Boston bombings, Rolling Stone magazine found out the hard way how the public feels about glorifying terrorists. Do you think the mass media is increasingly trying to blur the lines between good and evil?

SN: Yes I do, either consciously or subconsciously. First of all, Evil sells. Big time and that is what the public wants to see. And, evil often fits the media social view that criminals aren't really responsible for their actions and that our capitalistic system is in fact predatory and unfair to the less privileged. Therefore, the good guys deserve to be punished by the bad guys because this levels the playing field.

AMK: I know your work with your private firm and as a technical consultant for the entertainment industries allows you little time for one-on-one literary consultancy with writers. Would you make an exception for a particular project, and what would that be?

SN: Well, even though I find crime writing interesting, time and previous commitments have in the past made this a little difficult. However, I would make an exception for a particular project, time and interest allowing. I guess this would be on a case by case basis.

AMK: Finally, what book did you just finish reading, and what’s next on your reading list? 

SN: Funny you ask. I just finished your book Terminal Rage and also Charlie One Five - A Marine Company's Vietnam War by good friend and Marine Corps author Nick Warr. Like your book, Nick's latest offering is powerful and telling. Charlie One Five tells about a conflict where we never lost a battle but lost the war. And sadly many, many of America's best and brightest. 

From a personal perspective, I find my combat Marine Corps experience correlates with crime stories, particularly from the violent sides, and the dangerous leadership situations that occur during each and every young Marines combat experience. However, boring college text books are next on my list. I teach an ethics/law class next spring so I'm preparing for that course.

Readers: Do you like your FBI agents served nerdy and smart, or strong and infallible? And writers: What challenges do you face when depicting your law enforcement protagonists?

If you have any questions for Scott Nelson, please post them in the comments section below and I will field them and try to get Scott to answer as many of as possible.



A.M. Khalifa, author of international thrillers, writes exhilarating, contemporary stories pulsating with life and unforgettable characters. His debut novel, Terminal Rage, is a layered thrill ride that moves seamlessly from inside a nerve-wracking hostage situation to far-flung locations across the world, challenging readers to stay ahead of its unpredictable plot.

The ebook version of Terminal Rage is now on sale for $2.99 on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and Kobo. 

Villains need love, too

By Gayle Carline
Mystery Author and Lover of Bad Boys

I've started to get a few notes from my beta readers on my new mystery. The positive comments have buoyed me, and the criticisms have been right on the money. In particular, one reader called me out on a character that is unlikeable throughout the book, then gets the "touchy-feely psychoanalysis" treatment at the end.

Although this character is villainous, they are not the main bad person, so I didn't do as much background development with them as I did for the other characters. This was my error. Even minor villains need attention.

Once I realized my mistake, I started thinking about the evil characters that have slithered across my TV screen this season. They are as rich as any villains I can remember, so rich that I wish I had written them. Here are my favorites:

1. Peter Pan from Once Upon a Time - okay, this is a fantasy, not a mystery show, but the characters are both archetypal and real to me. Peter Pan is one of those characters I grew up with as a Disney kid. He was fun, benignly mischievous, and gallant in the clenches. The Peter Pan from OUAT is none of those things, but he makes so much sense. He has been a young boy for too long. Yes, kids can be sweet. They can also be whiny and petulant and selfish. What should be a joyous innocence has been rotted, like being too long on the vine.



What kind of positive trait could I turn into maliciousness in a villain? It sets my mind to spinning.

2. Red Reddington from The Blacklist - here is a master of evil at work. He is, as his creators have dubbed him, "The Concierge of Crime," completely without morals, working on his own agenda even as he claims to be helping the feds catch other criminals. And yet, there is this unexplained soft spot for Agent Keen. What does she mean to him?

(Note: This clip is creepy.)



He reminds me of the parable of the snake that asks a young girl to carry him across the river, assuring her that he will not bite on the way across, because they would both drown. Halfway across the river, she feels the sting of his fangs and asks why he did such a thing. "You knew what I was when you agreed," he told her.

Red looks like a man who may not actually have been born a sociopath, but who has been trained, through tragedy, to become one.

Both of these villains have been carefully crafted and are pure joys to watch. They are also reminders that I need to pay more attention to even my lesser meanies.

Have any of you stumbled upon any villains recently that you'd love to talk about?

P.S. If anyone's interested in a free book (paperback, ebook or audio), and/or free promo stuff (caps, bags, mugs) and/or gift cards, I'm running a contest on my personal blog. Come on over and win a SPAMMY! http://gaylecarline.blogspot.com/2013/11/giving-it-all-away-win-spammy.html

What Inspires You?

by Michael W. Sherer, thriller author

People often ask me where I get ideas for my thriller novels. And as often as I’m asked, I’m still surprised by it. I think it’s the wrong question. A better question is “What inspires me?”

Ideas are easy to come by, a dime a dozen. Open the newspaper and you’ll be assaulted with plot ideas. Stories about NSA eavesdropping, big business scams and $13 billion settlements, George Zimmerman’s latest brush with the law, even Obamacare are ripe and rife with kernels that can germinate and grow in the soil of a fertile imagination.

The origin of the plot for my first published mystery came from a story my father told me about how an investor cornered the market on shares of a company’s stock back in the ‘50s. The premise of my second book, in which a college student hangs himself in the woods off campus, evolved from a similar incident at my alma mater when I was a student. Blake Sanders, the protagonist of my current thriller series, grew out of a remark the local bookstore owner made about his newspaper carrier. And the concept for Night Tide, my latest novel, resulted from reading an article about a man freed from jail after serving 20 years for a crime he didn’t commit.

Ideas are everywhere. You can’t turn around without practically tripping over them. I sometimes think the most difficult aspect of being a writer is coming up with a) ideas no one’s thought of, or a new way of presenting them, and b) plots that are more thrilling than what’s in the news every day. Truth really is stranger than fiction. It’s our job as writers to take the same old same-old and breathe new life into it. The task—facing all those blank pages waiting to be filled with exciting plots and characters and settings that readers want to learn about—can be daunting.

Which is why I think the question of where inspiration comes from is more interesting. I’m inspired by a variety of sources in many different areas of my life. I play tennis five mornings a week with two different informal men’s groups. I also sub for another group occasionally on Sundays, and I’ve been on a USTA men’s doubles team this fall. On weekdays, I play at 6:45 a.m. every day, and there are days when that hour of the morning seems to come all too early.

My inspiration for showing up every day comes from a few places. Three of the men that play in the MWF group are within spitting distance of their 90th birthdays. If they can get out on the courts without complaint, certainly I can. And in fact, they’d be the first to say that upright and breathing beats the alternative, for which I’m grateful every day. The TTh men are a little younger—most are in their 60s and 70s—and many are better players than I am. They inspire me to play up to their level. And, of course, watching the pros play on Tennis Channel inspires me to take lessons so I can improve even more.

The volunteers at the Homeless Cooking Project, sponsored by St. Clouds restaurant in Seattle the third Wednesday of every month, inspire me to give back to the community more often. I love working in the restaurant—I spent several years during and after college working in the business—and feel even better knowing that I’m helping make really nice, restaurant quality meals for about 500 people.

Writing, Tom Clancy once said, is like digging dirt. There’s little remuneration for many authors, and the process can be long and thankless. So why do we do it? What inspires us to dream up stories and put them down on paper or in digital files, hoping readers will find them? Most of the authors I’ve talked to say they feel compelled to write. They can’t walk away from its siren call.

When it comes to writing, two things inspire me most: reading authors whose work I admire, and those whose work is inferior but for whatever reason is widely read. The former spur me to practice and hone my craft, to try to become a better writer with each book. The latter motivate me to prove not only that I am a better writer, but also that there’s an audience out there for good writing as well as good stories.

My greatest inspiration? The love of my life—my wife, Valarie. She inspires me to be a better person each and every day.

What inspires you? Where do you turn for inspiration?



Michael W. Sherer is the author of Night Tide, the second novel in the Blake Sanders thriller series. The first in the Seattle-based series, Night Blind, was nominated for an ITW Thriller Award in 2013. His other books include the award-winning Emerson Ward mystery series, the stand-alone suspense novel, Island Life, and the Tess Barrett YA thriller series.

He and his family now reside in the Seattle area. Please visit him at www.michaelwsherer.com or you can follow him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/thrillerauthor and on Twitter @MysteryNovelist.

FBI 101 for Crime Fiction Writers: Interview with Scott Nelson

by AM Khalifa, thriller writer, Google+

Scott Nelson is the film industry’s leading technical expert on all matters FBI. Most recently he was Clint Eastwood’s main point of reference on J. Edgar, the historic biopic of the FBI's founder. A former and highly decorated marine, Mr. Nelson rose to head the FBI's public affairs office where he was instrumental in the creation of America’s Most Wanted, as well as convincing the filmmakers of the Silence of the Lambs to shoot on location at the FBI’s academy in Quantico, Virginia.

I sat down with Scott for a coffee and a chat near Westlake Village in Southern California, where he now runs a global security and risk management firm. I wanted to glean some valuable advice for crime fiction writers. This is is the first of a two-part interview. Click here for part two.

AM Khalifa: During your time heading the FBI's public affairs office, did you ever work with crime fiction writers, and if so, what are they typically trying to research?

Scott Nelson: Yes. Typically crime fiction writers want to know how it works in the real world and then how those basic techniques and tactics can be tweaked to create more interest and more drama. Everyone is looking for that new story, and as times change that new story will always emerge. Plus, old stories can be retooled to present new facts and new views.

AMK: As an FBI insider, what is the number one misconstrued notion about the Bureau that you would like to set the record straight on here, once and for all?

SN: That the FBI always screws over the "locals" (local and state law enforcement). Simply not so. The Bureau works hand in glove with state and local officers and provides ongoing valuable training, research, services and support. In fact, many joint operations are run every day.

AMK: However, I think readers and viewers LOVE it when the smart, omnipotent FBI agent slights the incompetent locals and pulls rank and jurisdiction. They feel secure of a positive outcome when a favorably drawn FBI agent is involved. Do you agree?

SN: Yes, but likewise there is a tendency to show cops merely as doughnut eaters. And therefore, many cops - particularly suits in the front office - are quite defensive and constantly trying to prove their worth. I've been blown off on many occasions by locals who do resent the FBI and their own lot in life.

AMK: How accessible is the FBI as an organization to independent authors reaching out to it for technical information, and what specific mechanisms exist to deal with such requests?

SN: The FBI Office of Public Affairs, Washington D.C. and the Public Affairs Agents in the many field offices are very receptive to independent authors looking for technical information. The FBI is always trying to "tell their story" but the level of interaction and assistance will often depend on the topic, the legitimacy of the work, and the track record of the author. Usually there are some requests that can't be accommodated for a variety of reasons. That is where former FBI Agents come in. They may be useful.

AMK: What useful resources and tips for crime fiction writers seeking to research the FBI or FBI agents can you share with us?

SN: Talk to a real FBI Agent, and don't believe all you hear from the so-called crime experts. There is also a tremendous amount of online information available, including legitimate search warrants, interviews, organization charts, etc. I would definitely take advantage of this information. Much of what authors want to know has already been done. No sense re-inventing the wheel, although new and fresh perspectives are always welcome.

AMK: I've heard you describe the typical look and feel of an FBI agent. Do you think established contemporary novelists tend to get the FBI right in their narratives, or is there room for improvement?

SN: That's a good question. So, I'll ask one myself and then answer it. Do you think FBI Agents are super sleuths, pushy and nerdy? Well, some are but most are not. The Bureau is made up of thousands of men and women with varied occupations, skill sets, genders, and ethnicity. Doctors, lawyers, accountants, military officers, teachers, engineers, etc. are proud to call the FBI home. Real agents are real people with real problems and real accomplishments. Actually, they seek to serve and so they do. Although J. Edgar Hoover promoted the super G-Man, "can do no wrong" concept, which actually helped the FBI solve cases and still does, that view can be more fiction than fact.

AMK: Is the FBI concerned about crime writers inspiring copy cats? And if so, where do we draw the line between freedom of speech and social responsibility?

SN: Great question. Real is often boring, while blood, sex, color, violence and "I can't believe that happened" are often titillating and popular. And repeated. Salacious also sells. Deviants often get ideas from the media and because it is done once, they psychologically give themselves ethical permission to do it again. I do think the FBI is concerned about copy-cat crimes and we often see similar crimes following serious publicized incidents. That said, members of the public have a right to know and make up their own minds. Freedom of speech - not yelling fire in a crowded hall - is paramount. Social responsibility is also tremendously important. The balance between the two is personal, guided by ones ethics, existing laws and regulations, and just good common sense. Doing the right thing is actually black and white and a pretty easy thing for most of us. Writers included.

AMK: Many crime writers go through their careers without ever meeting real-life criminals. Do you think it would add any value for a crime writer to interact with some of the seriously bad people we tend to write about?

SN: Yes. Many stories are gleaned from interviews of crooks, deviants, and weirdos (whatever they are). Human motivation is a complicated thing, and understanding the motivations of seriously bad people can be insightful. Short of that, talking to some real FBI agents and conducting strong research are helpful.

AMK: Do you find your experience in law enforcement gives you an advantage in predicting unexpected twists and turns in a crime novel?

SN: Yes. Been there, done that helps a lot. On the other hand, that experience can sometimes restrict out-of-the-box thinking because frankly, many neat turns and twists are simply figments of some writers' imaginations.

AMK: Are there particular crime story lines you feel are not broached enough that would make for compelling fiction?

SN: My sense is that much of it has been covered in one way or another. But there is always more out there. High tech/cyber crime solving is always of interest as is the more basic terrorist crime fighter profile of an agent winning against great odds. Also, the FBI cracks big cases all the time and many of those offer good story-lines. In general, I think we all like the good over evil story where the disadvantaged crime fighter overcomes all odds to save America, often sacrificing his own life in the process.

AMK: What types of fiction genres and story lines appeal to you most and why?

SN: I listen to books on tape when time permits, often when I'm on the road. I did make a recent exception and read Terminal Rage.....guess that sounds familiar, huh? That story line appealed to me because it fronted a real character with real problems and a noble cause. Plus the good guy won. I must say that stories promoting right over wrong, the goodness of man, and the greatness of America, as opposed to glorifying evil, violence and man's darkness appeal to me.

AMK: Who are some of your favorite writers and your favorite books and films?

SN: My favorite writer is Ernest Hemingway - hardly a crime fiction writer - and I listen to The Old Man and the Sea over and over again as it depicts real life lessons of a good guy underdog overcoming great odds to accomplish something really worthy. As for crime films, my favorite is Silence of the Lambs, and my students always profile Hannibal Lecter in a Psycho Social Criminal Behavior graduate class I teach. We've also studied Clint Eastwood's J. Edgar, but unfortunately I think the writer for that movie was off-target in many respects. On the light side, I watch time and time again Scent of a Woman, Planes Trains and Automobiles, Good Morning Vietnam, Office Space and many other movies some might not actually classify as serious pieces.

Readers: Do you like your FBI agents served nerdy and smart, or strong and infallible?

Writers: What challenges do you face when depicting your law enforcement protagonists?

I send out a monthly newsletter with free fiction, intriguing interviews like this one, and insight on how a thriller novel like mine goes from the printed page to the silver screen. Join me on this amazing journey! Consider signing up as I also run cool competitions, give away free books (not just mine, but by authors I admire), and will protect your privacy and not share your email address with the widows of former Nigerian dictators, regardless of how much they offer me. Pinkie promise. Sign up, now!

AM Khalifa, author of international thrillers, writes exhilarating, contemporary stories pulsating with life and unforgettable characters. His debut novel, Terminal Rage, is a layered thrill ride that moves seamlessly from inside a nerve-wracking hostage situation to far-flung locations across the world, challenging readers to stay ahead of its unpredictable plot.

DiNunzio's Back!

The Accused (Rosato & Associates #12) by Lisa Scottoline (St. Martin's Press hardcover, 20 October 2013).

I love the Rosato & Associates books.  It's easy for any female reader to identify with Bernie, Mary and Judy, and the rest of their staff.  I've always identified most with Mary, who loves her family, but finds them somewhat embarrassing at times.

There are many embarrassing family moments in this story, which opens a party celebrating Mary's partnership at the firm.  Yes, Mary's parents are present, as are "The Three Tonys", friends of her father who treat Mary like a beloved niece, sometimes even "helping" her with her work. 

Uncomfortable with Change, Mary's a little overwhelmed by being the center of attention.  This pressure is eased by the arrival of a young woman hoping to hire her.  Allegra Gardner is thirteen years old, and despite being too young to sign a contract, wants Mary to prove that the young man arrested for murdering her sister six years earlier is innocent, even though he pleaded guilty.  She has her own funds, she says, and her parents are not opposed.

Since she's now a partner, Mary doesn't have to ask Bennie permission to take the case, but Making Decisions has always been difficult for her.  She eventually decides to do it, and finds that it's even more complicated than she'd imagined.

Meanwhile, her boyfriend, history professor Anthony Rotunno proposes to her:  yet another Big Decision to make, and more Change. 

This is a little lighter and more romantic than Scottoline's earlier novels in the series, which may be disappointing to some readers, but I found it to be a  delightful story that I completed in one afternoon.


FTC Full Disclosure:  Many thanks to Edelweiss and St. Martin's Press for the e-galley.

When Writers Shouldn't Read

By Peg Brantley
Evocative Characters. Intriguing Crime. Compelling Stories.



Last Sunday I participated in an author event at a local library. (A shout out for Douglas County Libraries and their support of indie authors!) At that event, and an earlier one for a major bestselling author, sponsored once again by Douglas County Libraries and Tattered Cover Bookstore, I heard authors read from their books.

Readings have historically been an expected part of author appearances. The author shares a little about their process, or their life, or something relevant to their book, and then they choose a passage or two to read aloud to the audience. It's a time-honored tradition.

I'm going out on a very long limb here to say it's a bad idea. And in some cases, a very bad idea.

It doesn't matter how well you think you read, and how much you love your book (I think I read aloud exceptionally well), you need to take a pass. Unless you've had professional training as an actor, the words you've written are best left to the ears and minds of the reader.

Most of the readings I've heard have sounded flat to my ear. Boring, really. Misplaced inflections, odd pronunciations, and either too fast or too slow. My mind begins to wander and I mentally check out.

Unless you've written a children's book and have a room full of four year-olds, reconsider including a reading in your author appearance. You'll probably be ahead of the game.

What do you think? Is it just me?

What is Your Dream Writing Space?

We just saw what Drew Kaufman refers to as his “Writing Cave” and it made me wonder how many other writers have such a place to write, and how similar or different author space really is. 

When I wrote my first book I was still practicing law. I was working fourteen-hour plus days, seven days a week and had virtually no time to write. So I set my alarm an hour and a half early every morning and wrote every day. I didn’t want to waste a minute of that precious time, so I parked my laptop on the bed and when I woke up I would roll over, sit up in the bed against the propped up pillows, and begin to write. It worked for me, at least for that book.

The rest of my books have been written primarily in my office in a comfortable chair with a desk computer. It’s quiet and no one disturbs me. And my walls are covered with inspirational comments such as this one to the left. It usually gets me started.

Actually, my whole house has motivational comments throughout, but the ones that inspire me to write are in my office. When I get stuck, I take a quick look around the room and read my walls. It usually gets me going again. And when I have deadlines to meet or I just don't feel quite as inspired as I need to be, this sign is a gentle reminder that I need to keep writing. 

So, there you have my “writing cave.” It’s not my “dream” writing space, but it works. My “dream writing cave” would be an office with a wall of glass looking out over the ocean in a quiet spot where I could hear the waves crash against themselves and the smell of sea water would permeate the air. Maybe some day.

Do you writers have your “dream writing cave?” If so, what is it? If not, where do you write?

A Glimpse Inside the Writing Cave

By Andrew E. Kaufman, author of psychological thrillers

It’s that time of year again.

No, I’m not talking about Fall or Thanksgiving or even Santa's much awaited visit (although, coincidentally, these things always happen around the same time). I’m talking about Deadline Fast Approaching Time. I’m talking about Deep Editing Time, or as I like to call it, That Whacky Time.

The Writing Cave in all it's disheveled beauty

The stakes are a bit higher this go-round, because, true to form, I’m running a little behind schedule (It’s a long story.You really don’t want to hear about it). That said, the Writing Cave isn’t exactly the Happiest Place on Earth, just a very messy one, with an occasional bottle rocket of angst firing through it. Guess you might say things are sort of rockin’ here, just not in a fun way—the other one.

Outside the Cave, it’s not looking a whole lot better. The dishes barely get done, we eat what we can scavenge or hunt, and we don’t come up for air unless absolutely necessary (translation: sleep deprivation, minimal human contact, personal grooming habits taken to a bare minimum). Hence, the reason why, while walking past a mirror the other day, I nearly scared the crap out of myself. Staring back was some crazed lunatic. We’re talking the whole nine yards: hair flying every-which-way, sweats and T-shirt beyond disheveled, and, oh… those sad, sleep-deprived eyes. The only thing missing was a sign that read: Will work for the return of my  life... and my sanity.

On the manuscript level, things appear a bit more hopeful, but only because the Cave administrator is a whip-cracking taskmaster (that’s me). Nothing is good enough, everything is out-of-whack, and the writing is in need of serious repair. While on some level, I know that none of this is actually across-the-board-true—on another, I’ve accepted that it’s part of my process. A crazy-making yet predictable process, yeah, but nevertheless, one that keeps me from bending to mediocrity. Well ... there's also the chocolate, the coffee, and of course, my fearless writing partner:

For evidence of my self-abuse, I present the following exhibits, where you will find a few excerpts from the manuscript:

A few minutes later, there are no more tears left to cry. <<You sure about that? 'Cuz so far in this chapter, I've counted ten. Bet he's got a few more>>

I gaze out, marveling at the miles of open-spaced freedom, a backdrop so stunning that it defies words. <<How about taking a stab at it anyway, since, like, that's kinda what we do here?>>

I look up toward the sky and see glistening stars against a velvety backdrop <<Brilliant. All we need now is a paper moon>>

I lean back and take in a cleansing breath <<He already took one of those in the last paragraph. I'm thinking he should be clean by now>> 

On the road, my mind begins lethargically wandering <<kinda like this sentence, huh?>> 

I smile at him, and he smiles back <<sure is a whole lot of smiling going on here. Did I miss the joke about unimpressive beat actions?>> 

The glimpses, although slow at first, were steadily building. The father I so deeply loved and admired, with whom I shared such immeasurable closeness, was gradually slipping away. << I'm thinking a few of those adverbs need to slip away, while we're at it.>> 

The point of this rather humiliating little display? If you think those words just flow onto the pages, think again. A lot has to come before that. Since I write thrillers, there is blood (but I try to keep that on the pages), then comes the sweat, followed by, of course, the tears.

And that, my friend, is how you make a book.

At least in my world.